LETTER OF APOLOGY
Dear Winnie,
Look, I can only be responsible for what I do, so whatever consequences that come with my actions I’ll accept, whether they are good or they are bad. Whether I consider my actions mistakes or not, because then they would be MY mistakes… and this was a mistake. I should have never hooked up with you, okay I’ll rephrase; I should have never had sex with you!
I was just trying to have a little fun but now look, like my friend Becky told me, I’m in a fix. She also thinks I used you… I disagree. Or perhaps I did, only that that was not my intention. I hate to see how much I’m going to crush your world and break your heart. Unfortunately there is not a nice way or the right time to break up with someone. It’s funny I’m talking about breaking up because I didn’t see you as my girlfriend. OMG I used you!
Honey, I’m scared at how emotionally you are handling the situation. I’m scared you are going to hate all men because of me. I heard Becky’s story, she’s had it rough with men. Poor thing don’t give up on men because of me, not like Becky. How can I be responsible for how you feel after all’s been said and done? Only you can decide to dust yourself off and try again, with someone else. Am I responsible to making sure you learn from this and that you go back to the emotional status that I found you in? …because if I could I would, just tell me how.
How old are you, anyway? Why did you lie to me? Now you tell me that you are in high school but it shouldn’t change anything, are you serious?! Just because you repeated a class doesn’t make you old enough, sweetheart. See, I wouldn’t have even dreamed to touch you had I known that fact. I just don’t roll with teenagers. Tony warned me about this crap! Tony is a close friend- he has a PhD in womenology, that’s why I trust him on the subject. I just don’t want you to go and do something crazy… get a grip of yourself.
“You know what that girl is probably thinking, Wyndago… she’s probably thinking of you as a potential husband. That’s what she sees you as…” that was Becky talking. Ptch, I don’t even see myself with a wife! …Yet. So lately I’ve been stressing myself over you because I’m about to break a heart, listening to that Michael Jackson’s song Billie Jean over and over. I feel like I’ve become the same exact person I feared to become. And right about now celibacy is quite a valid option for me because you girls come along with complications too much than I can handle, I don’t need none of that. I don’t need for someone to keep asking me where am at, acting up because I didn’t answer my phone or because you caught me in the middle of my sleep and you insist on talking.
I thought I could meet women and flirt and have fun, the sex part notwithstanding. You think you have it under control until it all becomes hazy once emotions set in. One thing leads to another and before you know it, before I knew it I found myself here. So now I’m thinking, how about not playing that game at all. I’m not happy to break your heart, Winnie. I’m hurting just to break it. Right now when I see women I see hearts made of glass waiting to be broken and crashed by a man, possibly with a bat (pun intended). I’m sorry I became that man for you. I’m really sorry. I even prayed about it last night, I’m sure God has forgiven me so will you also? One day, I hope you get to read this letter.
Yours truly,
Owen.
August 31, 2010 at 6:31 PM
I kinda think it’s not either of your problem that you find yourselves in this situation. Well, maybe it partly is. Your problem is thinking you could get to do stuff without consequences, while hers is naivety. Either way, I just described what human beings are made of. While you worry about her, remember that it is also going to pinch you nice to “break” up. The point is to learn the lesson and as you said pick yourself up and move on. It may take a week, a month or even a year, but we are humans remember? We tend to be quite resilient. If only we could learn life’s lessons just as well….
August 31, 2010 at 7:59 PM
She’s naïve alright, but i believe in consequences. Thats why i’d feel better if i were punished for what i did. But i appreciate to be spared but be cautioned.
September 1, 2010 at 3:45 PM
Hmm… this left me wonder whether to respond or not.
So sorry for the feeling. Hope it works out for the better.
September 4, 2010 at 2:37 PM
I’m sorry too.
September 2, 2010 at 9:19 PM
me thinks men will be men, always… and well though she was naive, the man being older should have been alittle more careful…. and not assumed she was going to just be easy…first off women get emotional its like that
September 4, 2010 at 2:47 PM
Don’t be too hard on men… and the man in particular. We are not all the same. Also, you should note that the woman lied about how young she is. But women are just too emotional now aren’t you? I feel sorry for this woman.
September 10, 2010 at 11:08 AM
If this is for real I have to hold myself back from saying any odd number of things…but anyway, it really irks me when men say women are too emotional. Women are emotional period. They are vastly different from men in this regard. You just need to understand that it’s never just fun and games with them, no matter what they do or say.
Another thing is that men have the ability to compartmentalize things. For you this could have been just what it was (not a relationship, apparently). But women don’t have that ability. So in this case, you are probably not as hurt as she is because all her emotions get involved in stuff.
Maybe you should actually physically apologize to her after the initial pain dies down.
“I thought I could meet women and flirt and have fun, the sex part notwithstanding.” – maybe in some other alternate universe/reality
September 10, 2010 at 12:50 PM
If this is not for real for me then it must be for someone else, so I would have liked to hear those odd number of things you were refraining from saying. But your comment is much appreciated all the same, an eye-opener.